It’s a Sunday, and I’m SUPPOSED to go to Mass.
Not that I’m Catholic, mind you, I’m just a Catholic wanna-be. I was raised Methodist, but my best friend and neighbor was Catholic, and I went to mass with her almost as much as I went to Church. When I made the decision to return to Christianity, I figured - well, Methodism couldn’t keep me, maybe Catholicism, could.
It’s a beautiful religion, and mass is very moving. The inner dramatist in me, really loves all the pomp and circumstance. When I read up on Catholic doctrine, I’m pretty astonishished on how much I agree with it. I’ve still got some things I need to resolve about it in my head though, before I cross the Tiber.
“Crossing the Tiber” is a lovely euphanism Catholics use for non-Catholics when they become Catholic. It’s a rather royal turn on words, that kinda make you feel like Caesar invading Rome. The fact of the matter is, I feel more like a pledge in her freshman year of college, trying to figure out which Sorority to rush.
It’s Sunday, and I can’t go to Mass because I haven’t figured out which Church I’m supposed to go to yet. That’s not quite right, I have a pretty good idea - it’s the one closest to me - which is still, 40 minutes away. But I can’t go to IT, because…. back in my pagan days, I had a very long and passionate love affair “inappropriate relationship” with a married man from that Church, and I don’t think Jesus would want me going there and looking at him every Sunday. Him and his wife, AND kids. That would just be cruel and unusual punishment, even for a Catholic.
Oh yes. Catholics sin, too. In fact I think they’ve perfected the art. He sure taught me a thing or three about sinning, he did. I guess now would be a good time to let ya’ll know, that some names on this blog have been changed, to protect the guilty as well as the innocent. I’m not here to get anyone in trouble, or to make anyone feel bad about what happened in my past. So, we’ll call Married Man #1, “Tom.” Yes, there were others.So. No going to Church behing Curtain #1, because of Tom.
Don’t reaaaaallly want to go to Church #2, for a couple of different reasons: one, I think my boss goes there, and that would just be icky; two, and yes this is just gossip and gossiping is a sin, BUT…. I heard through my daughter’s best friend’s boyfriend, who started confirmation classes there, that they’re stuck up and don’t really care about their flock - when he dropped out of classes, no one bothered to find out why. The only time he was approached by anyone from that Church again, was when they were looking for money.
Church #3 is a possibility. It’s not close to me either (none of the Churches are, really, I live out in the country) - but it’s smaller and in redneck country, too. Going to a redneck Catholic Church might be kinda fun.
Church #4 is way, way, on the other side of the county. I heard it’s very nice, so I’m leaving that option open, too.
The final Church, St. Thomas More Co-Cathedral, is smack dab in the middle of Tallahassee, right across from Florida State University. It’s a Church I attended many times, while attending FSU and for friend’s wedding masses. Since it is so close to the school, it has always had an open door policy, where Catholics and non-Catholics alike could attend. I like that Church a lot, and that’s where my daughter and I decided to go for Easter Mass.
Boy. Easter Mass was a hoot. It was standing room only, filled with Sorority women who were dressed to seduce. My twenty-three year old daughter and I were both stunned. Now, we understand that American Catholics dress a little more casual than what we are used to, growing up in the Methodist Church - but these Easter chickas were dressed more for a nightclub, if you ask me. Don’t get me wrong! I think that our bodies are a beautiful work of art… but that Church is just the wrong venue to display such art wearing hootchie-momma clothing.
If I go to that Church on a regular basis, that alone would most likely piss me off so much that I wouldn’t enjoy the mass. I’d be looking for safety pins in my purse to offer to those poor, deprived girls who obviously didn’t have enough money to buy appropriate clothing. At least their boobies wouldn’t be popping out. Man, that’s judgemental, isn’t it? STILL. I think even pagans would agree one simply doesn’t wear low-cut backless sundresses to CHURCH. It’s just not DONE.
However, there were some cute young guys there, which I was quick to point out to my daughter. After all, she is 23 and I need to find her a husband so I can get a grandchild or two. Funny, she didn’t notice them. She did notice some cute men MY age, though, she said. I think that brat daughter of mine is trying to find me a husband, too.
So… no Churches yet. Fortunately, I have a get-out-of-jail-card excuse, in that I’m sick today, and I don’t HAVE to go to mass. I’ll watch it on EWTN instead.
I’m actually looking forward to going to Church again every week. Most pagan groups, don’t do ritual on a weekly basis, and certainly, never on Sunday. I’ve found I get spiritually lazy if I’m not doing SOMETHING.
Something is good.
It wasn’t just me! it ’twas my daughter, too, so you KNOW there had to be some immodestly dressed women there.
Technically, the Church’s stance is not against *any* birth control - it’s against *artificial* birth control. Natural birth control methods do work, with proper education. That’s what I used when I was married - to a Catholic no less
As I understand it, the reasonings behind the Church’s stance on this is that they consider life to be sacred, and should be given an opportunity to flourish.
I do have some grumblings with the Church’s stance in not allowing the use of condoms. Considering how the Church is all about supporting *life,* you would think they would do all they could to help prevent the spread of HIV, and condoms are the #1 preferred choice. But these are discussions I’ll have to have with the Priest during RCIA classes.
Sex outside of marraige… FOR ME, and ME ONLY… you know after all these years of having illicit love affairs, of the one-night-stands and meaningless, debauched sex (gee I make it sound so wonderful, don’t I?)…. ya know? I can think of worse things than sex within the bonds of matrimony. At least when you’re married, you know you’re with someone who truly cares about you and is committed to you.
I’m not saying I *won’t* have sex before I get married, but I’m pretty certain it won’t be until I’m in a committed relationship, and it damn sure won’t be with a married man again.
Oh, I know fertility awareness can be very effective for some women - I’m one of them. Even at 49 you can set your watch by my cycle. But it’s not practical for *most* women. I’m also in agreement with you on the issue of condoms. I tend to think the Church flies in the face of reality on this one, and they’d do their flock an enormous lot more good, especially in the third world, if they’d come out in favor of condom use. I suppose that’s about as likely as their coming out in favor of gay marriage (another huge disagreement I have with the Church, not that they care what I think).
On the topic of sex, suffice it to say I’m delighted as all get out you’re going to avoid married men. As for the rest, I’m not much on meaningless sex anyway. I’m pretty straightlaced for a pagan.
Straightlaced for a pagan… YEAH! What’s up with that? lol
Dunno. It’s just how I’ve always been. Casual sex as a rule seems …. inefficient. The first time you sleep with someone isn’t usually the best time. So I figure…why go through life having a series of half-arsed sexual encounters when I can have better sex with someone I know and care about?
Yeah, cookie, it’s judgemental.
While I would tend to show up to any church in a dress and heels, my understanding is that this is no longer de rigeur in the Catholic Church. I guess I figure since I’m just a visitor I should be on my best behavior.
Cleavage isn’t a sin, though, and church is a social occasion as well as a religious one for a lot of people. If the only thing that’s keeping you from going to that church is a bit of cleavage, and it isn’t bothering the priest…maybe you shouldn’t be bothered either?
Although I have to tell you, it’s a hilarious mental image to see you in my mind tut-tutting the young women into covering up their cleavage.
And I have to ask…does your conversion to Catholicism mean no birth control, no sex outside of marriage either?