Earthquakes in China. Cyclones in Burma. Wildfires in Florida. Tornados in the midwest. Explosions in Jaipur. War in the Middle East. Having a day off and watching CNN is enough to raise your blood pressure.

One thing that surprises me the most about converting to Christianity, is the sense of inner peace I have. It’s something that is associated most I think, with Buddhism; that sense of calm amidst a swirling chaos.

I’ve certainly had my fair share of chaos and disasters in my personal life; at times it’s been overwhelming. When you’re pagan, you search for so many ways to “fix it” - spells, talismans, feng shui’ing your living quarters, teas, astrology, divinations, cleansings, purifications, shieldings, wardings, anything and everything we can think to do to make things better.

But ya know what? most of the time - those things don’t really help at all. At most, they’re pallative bandaids, at worst, they make things worse.

Now I’m a self-admitted control freak; I enjoy being in control of a situation, I’m a natural leader, and I’m good at it. When I was pagan, I was always running around, tweaking this part of my life, diminishing this, promoting that. Since I’ve become a Christian? not so much!

The difference, I think, comes from the accepting of my submission to God.

Now that’s a term that has some negative connotations, especially when it comes to religion. We associate submission to religious extremists, who have used the term to justify waging war on those who don’t agree with them. Instead of “The devil made me do it,” they say “God made me do it.”

I call bullshit. God does not want His children killing each other, and certainly not in His name; that’s pretty clear in every religion. Those extremists are not listening, nor submitting, to the will of God; they’re listening, and submitting, to their own base natures.

True submission to God means you really listen to God and do what’s right, even when you’d really rather do differently. That’s not an easy thing to do. It means, you put down the bong, because you know it’s ruining your body. It means, you forgive your enemies, even though you’d rather continue a conflict. It means, you practice your faith, instead of giving lip service to it.

But once you start practicing that submission, once you stop trying to control every little thing in your life, once you “let go and let God,” an amazing thing happens. You’re blessed with inner peace.

It’s not that all of a sudden, you no longer have problems, you no longer have challenges, and life is happy-happy-joy-joy all the time. You still have to deal with your addictions, your enemies, and your doubts, but now you’re not alone; you’ve got help. Someone Else is in control, and is there to help you deal with them. That gives you an immediate sense of relief; it’s like a huge burden has been lifted from your shoulders - because, well, it has been.

I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that despite the chaos swirling around me, I’m going to be O.K. What a wonderful feeling that is.