Larry said something to me the other day that struck a nerve.
We were discussing a particular photo he took, and he wanted to know why I like his photos, why I think they turn out well. I said it was because he has a passion for his work; he said no, it was because of discipline. He also said, if I ever want to get good at photography, I’d better learn how to be disciplined.
I realized, after that conversation - I’m not really good at discipline. Oh sure there are somethings I’m very disciplined about, my work being one, but when it comes to my private life - not so much so!
And I started wondering - why is that?
well….
I work hard, everyday. When I come home I just want to pamper myself. Everyday.
But there’s a very slight difference between pampering yourself, and feeling sorry for yourself. Pamper parties quickly turn into pity parties. And I’ve been living a pity party.
So what’s the answer to pulling out of a pity party? Of actually achieving what you want to achieve? Of actually doing something with your life?
I think Larry’s got it right: Discipline.
Oh, how I used to hate that word. To me it seemed like it went hand in hand with “punishment” - and it’s not really that way at all. Discipline provides structure; corner posts to build your life around.
I used to be disciplined. I used to be SO organized, too. Everyday, I’d wake up and make a list of things to do, and would have great satisfaction in crossing off those things. What didn’t get done that day, would go on the next day’s list. And you know what? I got shit DONE, man. My bills were all paid way ahead of time, my house was always clean, my laundry, always done, my garden looked fantastic, my daughter and I were happy & healthy.
Somewhere along the line, I lost that. And yeah, I think being pagan had something to do with it. First, the lists went - I was a druid, I was supposed to be able to remember what I was supposed to do, right? - Except I didn’t. And then I would just pass it off as, well, that’s being too anal retentive about stuff anyway, and what pagan you know is anal retentive about ANYTHING? Besides Virgos, that is.
The REAL Druids - were anal retentive. About everything. And that’s why a lot of Celtic Reconstructionists get a bad rap - they’re just being very disciplined about being anal retentive, in a pagan community that pretty much frowns that sorta thing.
I got really lazy, being a pagan. While I can’t lay all the blame for that on paganism’s feet, I do see how it certainly sets the stage for it.
So
Time for changes. Time to re-learn some discipline. I’ve started by going to the gym everyday. I’ve committed to walking, everyday, for thirty minutes. That’s where discipline is most needed in my life at this time - I NEED to get this knee stronger. I NEED to get some of this weight off. Doing this will help accomplish those goals.
All it takes is discipline.
Ya’ll pray for me. I’m gonna need it!
hmm. i’m diciplined about some things because my memory is NOT reliable. not at all, not now, not ever. no no no. the list witll be made, the list will be done and crossed off. its just the way it has to be.
and TheEngineer has said he will expect certain things of me, but he DOES understand my memory issues, and will help me with lists and reminders.
tell yourself that jesus expects you to respect your body as a temple, perhaps? and that getting things done in their proper time is a offering of obedience to him also? (render unto caeser and all that noise.)
*hugs* good luck
It bothers me that you seem to associate being Pagan as being lazy, and immoral, and BAD! No matter what path you walk, it is up to YOU to get off your ass and do something, or not do something.Just because you are Pagan does NOT mean we all make bad choices and screw married men, or do not do the dishes for a week, or let the laundry pile up to the roof. You can be just as much of a lazy schmuck and be “Christian”. I myself am Pagan, but have not always been. I know a hell of a lot more upstanding members of society that are Pagan then Christian. Being ANY religion is not a reason, or an excuse, that you can use to give your self a pardon for not being as disciplined as you feel you should be. Just because you made bad decisions when you were a Pagan does not mean it was Paganism’s fault! People are responsible for their own actions…regardless of what path they choose to walk.
I completely agree with you, when you say people are responsible for their own actions, regardless of what path they choose to walk.
You must have missed my “nice” posts about paganism
I was surprised when I saw you lived In Tally. I was born and raised here, and now live in Crawfordville. I thought I would have heard of you when you were a Pagan..
I sincerely hope that you find what you are looking for…but it is not right to bash another religion just because YOU made wrong choices in YOUR life while you were Pagan. Other people do not make the same mistakes, and other people who read your blog, especially young ones, might look upon what you right as an expert opinion…and then go around spouting hate and ignorance because of it. I know a blog is your words, but as an author of any sort, a modicum of thought she be put into what is posted for the world to see.
no reason why you wouldn’t have, unless you weren’t involved in the pagan community at all. I was the president of the Red Hills Pagan Council for many years.
You must have missed my “nice” posts about pagans and paganism. Like all things, there are good and bad parts to it.
Discipline…
From the American Heritage Dictionary:
n.
1.Training expected to produce a specific character or pattern of behavior, especially training that produces moral or mental improvement.
2.Controlled behavior resulting from disciplinary training; self-control.
3.Control obtained by enforcing compliance or order.
4.A systematic method to obtain obedience: a military discipline.
5.A state of order based on submission to rules and authority: a teacher who demanded discipline in the classroom.
6.Punishment intended to correct or train.
7.A set of rules or methods, as those regulating the practice of a church or monastic order.
8.A branch of knowledge or teaching.
I like the one that says “self-control” You must have self control to accomplish anything. You cannot blame religion, what you eat, who you hang out with, or anything else on lack of self control…YOU and YOU alone are responsible for that. Maybe you gave your self permission…made being a “pagan” the excuse for your lack of self control…but that is not fair. You are responsible for your lack of self control. I am a Pagan…in my learnings and readings…I have been tought that you must have self control and discipline…that there are right ways of doing things and then there are wrong ways. I believe that no matter what religion you profess to follow…it all begins with self control and discipline…how else are you to get things accomplished and live your life in a reasonably sane manner. This is just like the drup addict saying he took drugs and did bad things because “God” told him too. Don’t look and use one form of belief to try to cover us and make it look like the cause of your own lack of self control.
Hope you have found some now…good luck on your “new-found” path….
Bright Blessings…